I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
