Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize