I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
