suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
