Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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