you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
