Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
farters have to be the big spoon...
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
