did you get engaged???
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize