Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
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