thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize
