She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
