He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
so let's talk penis.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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