Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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