So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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