it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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