At least make sure they are 18
Why
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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