My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
