wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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