ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Randomize