I wanna bring you to show and tell
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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