We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize
