how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
