i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Randomize
