I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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