come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Randomize
