I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Randomize
