Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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