Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Randomize