When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
