I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize
