There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Randomize
