marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
