i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
