Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Randomize
