We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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