we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
