Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Randomize
