clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
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