Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
