fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Randomize