He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
