They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize