Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
