She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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