I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Randomize
