nut hugger
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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