i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Randomize