There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
