yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize
