I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
My underwear smells like fireworks.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
