therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
